Stay With Me
by iheartShules
Summary: John gets hurt, and goes M.I.A. while Joss won't believe he's dead. When John reappears he's a bit worse for wear. ::This story is just a two shot since its incredibly long, and it is NOW RATED M bawahahahahahaha I do adore smut :D ::
1. Chapter 1

"_I__ need you to listen to me." the soft gasping noise he made as he spoke was raspy, and low made her want to cry. She struggled to apply more pressure onto his wound. He couldn't die she wasn't going to let him._

"_No John."_

"_Joss I don't have a lot of time left, and I rather say what needs to be said before I lose consciousness." she dug her hand into his wound harder which he gasped at, but didn't make any other sound of pain. "You know what you need to do."_

"_You're right John I need to keep you alive long enough for the ambulance to get here." she fought the tears that threatened. She would fall apart later when she was alone, but right now John needed her attention. He protected her by taking a bullet to the gut thanks to her stubbornness. She should have listened to him when he yelled to stay down, but her mind had been on the stupid man that they had come to save. Now John was bleeding from a wound that was scaring her shitless._

"_I am going to cause a distraction so you, and Mr. Bombay here can run out to get to your car."_

"_You think I'm leaving you?! You must be delirious from your gunshot wound because you are nuts to think I am going to leave you here." she tried to keep her tone angry rather then fearful. She couldn't leave him how could he think she would?_

"_I'll be fine."_

"_John this isn't funny these people outnumber us by four, and you are already injured. I won't leave you here to die."_

"_You have no choice Joss." he reached a hand up brushing his finger against her cheek. This was the second time he was forcing her to leave him to die in a matter of a few months. The first had been when a bomb was strapped to his chest, and now thanks to her he was bleeding profusely from a wound he wouldn't have gotten if she had just listened._

"_Not to sound callous or anything, but we need to do something they are making their way over here." Joss shot a hateful glance at the stupid elderly man that they had come here to save. Why should he live, and not John? He lived a full life he was in his eighties, and yet here she was being asked to leave the man she cared for deeply to die while she saved his pathetic self. He was nothing more then a glorified criminal himself while John saved countless lives._

"_There has to be another way out." she tried to figure out just how._

"_I will not risk you being hurt Joss." he shoved her hand away from the wound, and he picked up his discarded gun sucking in ragged breaths. "On the count of three I am going to make a run for it in the opposite direction of the door while their eyes are on me you make a break for it."_

"_No."_

"_Joss." he bowed his head in agitation, and he was getting more and more pale which was scaring her. Joss's need to save him was overwhelming her choking the breath right out of her. "I don't have time to argue with you. Please do this for me."_

"_I can't." this time when the tears threatened they escaped. She couldn't walk away from him not again. The first time had been hard, but to do it a second time was just torturous._

"_Yes you can." he whispered with a small smile on his face. "Because you have too when you can you'll come back for me."_

"_No." she shook her head snapping her eyes shut hating the tears that fell. She wanted to be strong, but she felt like she was dying inside. What he was asking her to do was impossible. "What if its too late John?" he didn't answer her just caressed her face with his soft blue gaze._

"_One, two…" but before he could get to three she kissed him quiet. John laid beneath her shocked as she kissed him like their lives depended on it which it did. She cupped his cheeks, and pushed back staring at him deep in the eyes. _

"_Promise you'll come back John, or we'll die together." her eyes searched his allowing him to see she wasn't scared of dying by his side._

"_Joss-"_

"_Promise me, or I'm not leaving you."_

"_I promise you Joss I will annoy you with dropping bodies again." she forced herself to be okay with that promise, and when he nodded his head at them getting to his knees she let him. He motioned for them to get ready. "Three." he got up and charged in the opposite direction. She could hear gunshots and male shouts as she, and Mr. Bombay ran in the opposite direction of where John went. She shot her gun at the two goons that decided to not fall for their ploy, and she clipped the one in the leg. They ran as fast as they could to her car hiding behind it when gunshots began riddling it. She sighed in heavy relief when the cavalry showed up. Finally! Joss stopped, and turned to fire some more at the man to allow Fusco a chance at getting out of his car to aim his weapon._

"_Ms. Carter?"_

"_What Bombay?" she snarled not in the mood to listen to his voice at all. He was the reason they were in this shootout, and the reason John was inside the warehouse right now dying._

"_I'm not sure if this is the right time to tell you or not, but the warehouse is set to explode."_

"_WHAT?!" he should have said something earlier. This old man let her leave John in a building that had a bomb inside?!_

"_They had been setting up a bomb when you, and Mr. Reese came to save me."_

"_So John's injured, in a damned gun fight inside the warehouse we saved you from, and it's set to explode in any moment?"_

"_Yes."_

"_I am going to kill you myself!" John was inside that building still, and panic bubbled up inside her. She had to get to him, and get him out of there. She wasn't going to let him die he wasn't going to get away from her that easily!_

"_Fusco the building is going to explode, and John's still inside!" she desperately had to get back to John. She stood up, and shot the man that had been firing at them straight in the chest. He screamed as he fell to the ground. "Watch Bombay!" she didn't stop to take a breath, or listen to the shouts from Fusco as she ran towards the warehouse where John was still at. She had to get to him she just had too! John needed her, and he had always been there for her. But before her very eyes the building exploded, and the giant boom sent her flying off of her feet crashing to the ground flat on her back as flames engulfed the warehouse. _

"_JOHN!" she screamed…_

* * *

Joss sat up straight in bed screaming her head off as her body shook uncontrollably. She hurriedly got up off the bed stumbling forward needing to head to the bathroom. She just made it before she retched violently as the images of her nightmare continued to haunt her behind her eyelids as she got sick again, and again. She laid her head on the cool porcelain toilet seat with her eyes squeezed shut lifting her hand to flush the toilet. When she wasn't in danger of getting sick again she weakly got to her feet moving to the vanity. She turned the faucet on, and splashed ice cold water on her face. She continued to shake, and tremble as the terrible nightmare that had been plaguing her for days now preyed on her mind. John was still M.I.A, and she was scared that he was really gone. He promised her he would be alright. They had found most of the remains of the men that had been in the warehouse with him at the time it went off, but not a single sign of John which kept her hope alive.

Harold had promised to call her the moment John might call him. She was hopelessly optimistic. She wasn't going to believe he was dead he promised her he would make it out, and John never broke his promises. Joss shut the faucet off, and dried her hands staring at her reflection in the mirror. Her face was gaunt from not sleeping, and not eating as all her energy had been on finding John. Harold, Fusco, and herself had searched the surrounding areas where John might have run off too when the building exploded. But not a single sign of John appeared, and they had gone home without any lead as to where John was located at. Her kid was worried about her, and she couldn't even tell him why she was so upset. She couldn't not when her son had lost so much in his life, and experienced so much disappointment in his short sixteen years of life. How could she explain to her son who had come to really like John that he had been shot, and she left him in a building set to explode? Oh god it was all her fault, and bile rose up as she dropped to her knees in front of the toilet again vomiting all over again. John was shot, and missing because of her. She didn't listen to him she always thought she knew better, and John paid the price for it.

She trembled as she finished getting sick slowly flushing the toilet before once more splashing cold water on her face, and slurping some much needed water to spew it out cleansing her mouth. She turned the faucet off again shutting the light off, and exited the bathroom. Joss was in John's loft she needed to come here for some reason, and she had gotten Finch to tell her where John lived thanks to some alcohol. Poor Harold he had looked like he lost his brother rather then a friend it was like he was giving up hope that John was still alive. Joss slowly walked unevenly into the giant room of his loft. It was all connected which made it feel roomy, and she could imagine John stalking this place with his giant strides. She had laid on his bed silently weeping wishing he was here, and pissing her off with his flippant disregard of her rules until she must of finally fell asleep which lead to that nightmare of that fateful day all over again. Joss stopped to stare out the window into the night's sky before she walked back over to where John slept at night.

Joss noticed a lone suit jacket of his on the floor which meant he was in the hurry at some point flinging it off not caring where it fell. She squatted down picking it up feeling an unknown emotion fill her as she stood up lifting it to her nose inhaling softly. The tears slid down her cheeks falling quietly onto the suit jacket as his scent clung to the jacket. His cologne, and natural male scent only John possessed filled her nostrils making it almost impossible to breathe. She never felt an ache like she did at this moment at the thought of never seeing him again. What if she never got to see those haunting blue eyes that expressed his emotions so easily when the rest of him was a closed book? What if she never got to see one of those rare smiles he only reserved for those closest to him?

Joss hugged the jacket to her body crushing it to her wishing he was inside him holding him telling him the things she had held inside her for so long because she was scared. She was scared of feeling too much for him, and she was scared to admit to herself that she thought of him in ways that weren't purely platonic. She had allowed her pride, and fear of being hurt to strip away her confidence in herself costing her something far richer, and more fulfilling then just his friendship. Joss didn't want to feel the overwhelming sorrow anymore so instead she got angry. She got angry with herself, and him. Damn it he promised her!

"You promised John!" she shouted listening to her voice echo throughout the cold, and empty loft her eyes on the ceiling above her. "You promised me you would be alright I wouldn't have left you alone if I thought for one minute you wouldn't come-" she couldn't finish the words. She bit her lower lip harshly as it quivered. "_Help me find you_." she whispered brokenly to the empty room wishing he could hear her. She jumped when her cell phone rang, and she didn't feel like answering it. She pulled it out of her pants pocket, and eyed the blocked number. This had to be Harold.

"Hello." her voice cracked sounding like she had something in her throat.

"Detective?" the slurred speech was definitely Harold's.

"What?"

"He called Mr. Reese is alive!" Joss felt herself sink to the floor unable to hold herself up as pure elation so quick, and so keen stole her ability to even think.

"Where is he?" she would travel to the ends of the earth to bring him home safely.

"He's on his way to the loft right now he asked for me to pet Bear for him then for me to get some sleep, and to get sober." she felt a smile grow on her lips.

"Where has he been?"

"I don't know detective, but he sounds ill take care of him for me."

"Will do." she wasn't going to let him out of her sight until she was a hundred percent sure he was alright. There was a sound at the door. "I think he's here." she hung up with a tipsy Harold before putting down his suit jacket she had been clutching to her like her life depended on it. The door to the loft swung open, and he filled the doorway even though she knew he was coming her breath hitched, and tears of joy filled her eyes. She ran towards him quickly surprising John she was there in his loft. He flicked the light switch on filling the room with the soft light.

"Joss?" his voice was hoarse as if he hadn't used it days. Pure unadulterated joy filled her heart that he was alive as she ran over towards him, but the closer she got to him her joy faded to worry. John didn't look so good. His face was almost a grayish color, and his lips were so very pale. John's pale skin shined with a thin sheen of sweat she noted the beads of sweat on his forehead, and upper lip. Harold was right John was very ill. Joss couldn't resist the urge to throw her arms around him needing to touch him to truly know he was alright.

"This is real right? Oh god please tell me you are real, and that my mind isn't conjuring you up John." she sobbed as she trembled in his arms. He was trembling himself.

"I'm here." he whispered his one arm that was wrapped around her waist while he kept the other still at his side. The hand that was wrapped around her was splayed across her lower back rubbing in circles to soothe her. She pushed back out of his arms needing to attend to him, and not to her own selfish needs right now. Her sharp gaze dropped to the arm he was holding to him protectively where he had been shot. Joss tenderly grabbed his arm pressed inward to his body, and he allowed her to move it.

"Let me see John." she soothed hating the small whimper he made. Never in her life had she heard him make such a sound, and it formed a lump in her throat all over again. John was hurt because of her, and she was going to take care of him even if he didn't want her too. His arm stayed to the side as she gently pushed his suit jacket out of the way gasping softly looking at the same crimson stain on his shirt as she had before, but this time instead of it wet and sticky like it had been it was now dried. She made quick work of his shirt deciding he had a billionaire friend who could buy him a new shirt as she tore it apart. John didn't even make a joke about it as he continued to just sway back, and forth on his feet watching her with hooded eyes.

Joss hid her worry when she saw his wound leaning in close to his body peering at it. He had done something to it to close it which spoke to her of the years of his training in the military, and in the CIA.

"What did you do to your wound John?" she knew the bullet had been deep, but it hadn't gone straight through. She prayed he hadn't left the bullet in there, but the idea of him pulling the bullet out alone wherever he had been left a bitter taste in her mouth.

"I closed it better then a doctor could with stitches." she didn't argue with him that a doctor would have made sure it was sterile cause clearly the surrounding area of his wound was swollen. It was clearly infected.

"John did you dig the bullet out?"

"Mmmmhmmm." he mumbled when she slowly pulled on his good hand so she could shut the door. Once she had him fully inside she shut the door locking it, and lifted a hand to his forehead. Her eyes widened in shock at how he was burning up. His skin looked clammy, and he was shivering slightly.

"With what?"

"It was something I found Joss I don't remember." no doubt with his infection he was growing lethargic. She was getting more and more concerned. She needed to get it under control maybe she could get him to a hospital under one of his aliases. But knowing how John was she wasn't going to get him out of the front door let alone to a hospital. Joss had to concentrate on lowering his fever before she could cleanse his wound. She licked her lips as she pushed his shirt, and suit jacket off his shoulders which he allowed to happen. They fell to the floor without any resistance at all from him. His chest was now slick with sweat too, and his body was shuddering violently now. She grabbed his hand of the arm that wasn't pulled protectively to his body forward towards his bathroom.

"Where we are going?" his eyes looked towards his bed.

"We need to lower your fever John."

"No I'm tired Joss I want to go to sleep."

"Later John you need to get in a lukewarm shower. We need to try to break your fever." he shook his head stopping.

"You can leave now Joss I'll be fine."

"No." she tugged on his hand not listening to him. The last time she did he was alone taking on like six guys with his lone pistol bleeding, and she had been safe saving an old man that let her leave John inside with a bomb ready to go off. He wasn't going to be alone when he needed someone now. She tugged on his good hand hard not about to take his direction, and he actually allowed her to lead him to the bathroom. He wasn't resisting or talking back to her, and he was stumbling a little bit which was worrying her. She flicked the light on pushing him against his vanity to turn his shower on waiting till she had a decent temperature. It wasn't cold, but it wasn't warm either.

"Now what?" he watched her.

"Get undressed John."

"You first." the flirty comment would have made her happy had he not been delirious from his fever, and his infection which meant that most likely he wasn't going to remember this conversation in the morning.

"John, you need to get in the shower okay."

"Only if you join me." she exhaled roughly getting fed up with his sexy comments since she wasn't sure if she could trust them or not. Well if he wasn't going to get in the damned shower the easy way well then there was always the hard way. She wasn't going to let him die from infection because he was so damned stubborn. She walked over to him, and began unbuckling his belt as her eyes remained on his. His blue eyes were dilated a bit which worried her, but the half smile was encouraging that he was still with her. His arms hung at his sides allowing her to undo the belt. "My dream come true."

"You dreamt of me taking your pants off?" she whispered as she undid the button before lowering the zipper. She didn't want to let him know that she had dreamt of taking his pants off herself, but in a very different capacity. "Lift your foot John." she commanded as he did she squatted down to push his dress shoe off the lifted foot, taking his sock off. Damn even his feet were sexy. She needed help thinking this way about a man that was very ill. He put it down, and lifted the other so she could do the same for his other foot before she got back up. She pushed his pants down his slender hips, and they pooled around his ankles leaving him in his dark colored boxer-briefs. Well now she finally got an answer to her question of whether, or not John wore boxers or briefs it was a little of both.

"I dream of you in my bed Joss." the soft spoken confession curled around her heart. It was good to know he thought of her much the same way she thought of him.

"John get in the shower."

"Nu-uh I told you only if you join me." she was having a hard time resisting his smile, and words. But when he violently shook uncontrollably it reminded her of why he was acting like this. She reached down hooking her fingers beneath the elastic of his underwear wishing she could handle where this was going, and pushed them down. She tried not to stare at a completely naked John Reese, but she couldn't help it. John was so devastatingly gorgeous. His body was built like a damned Adonis all sleek, smooth, and muscular. His cock was long, thick, and powerful looking. She ignored the fact that he was growing erect since it was only natural for a man to get excited being undressed by a woman. She forced her gaze away knowing she was taking advantage of his state of mind, and pulled him to the shower. She opened the shower door, and pushed him in before following him inside fully clothed. John gasped at the cold feel to the water on his overheating skin. She felt bad for him when he tried to take a step back, but with her body in the way he couldn't avoid the pelting water on his skin.

"Stay there John for a few minutes let the lukewarm water work on your fever."

"Its so c-cold."

"Its only cold to you because of your fever John." Joss was standing behind him so she took the opportunity to gaze at him without his knowledge. He had a nice ass, but he had so many scars on his body which told her he had been tormented, and tortured before. She knew it, but seeing them made it hit closer to home of all that John went through in his life which just made her want to take care of him even more. Once she was satisfied he had stayed under the spray of lukewarm water for several minutes did she reach around him and turn the water off. She began taking first her shoes, socks, and pants off before whipping her blouse over her head leaving herself in her bra and panties. They were damp, but not as wet as the rest of her clothing was thanks to his body being in front of hers. John turned around and his eyes were on her body.

"B-beautiful." his body continued to shiver. She stepped out the shower first looking for a towel producing one from the cabinet under the sink. John followed her out, and he looked ready to fall over in exhaustion. Once she got him dried off, and back in some clothing she was going to get him to lay down after taking some aspirin, and she was going to cleanse his wound. Joss lifted the heavy towel up plopping it on his head, and began running it through his hair before bringing it down his body dabbing at the droplets of water. She took great care of not pressing to hard on his wound, but even the small amount of pressure she applied to swipe at the wetness gathered on his wound made him make a soft moan of pain. Joss watched his eyes for a moment hoping the cool shower helped break the fever that was setting in on him.

Joss couldn't help, but react to his body as her eyes dropped down subconsciously to his manhood poking her in the belly. She licked her lips feeling her desire for him grow even though he was injured and ill. She ignored her growing desire wrapping the towel loosely around his hips silently cursing herself. Lusting after a hurt man was deciding wrong in her mind.

"You can finish drying off while I go get you something clean to wear." she kept her eyes from his as she escaped out the bathroom hurrying over to the dresser in the corner nearest his bed. She went through looking for a pair of boxers finally finding them for him. When she went to run off to give them to him she plowed right into him thanks to him being right behind her earning a grunt of pain from him, and she made a soft noise in the back of her throat reaching out to steady herself. She saw the towel was still around his hips, but the knot was loose ready to fall apart leaving him naked again.

"Put these on." she commanded. He smiled softly at her.

"Aye aye captain." he pulled the knot apart at his right hip and towel fell to the floor, and grabbed the boxers she held out to him. She smacked a hand to her eyes wishing he would stop getting naked in front of her. "What are you doing?" he asked.

"Giving you some privacy since you obviously don't seem to want to give yourself any."

"You can open your pretty eyes now Joss." his voice was growing heavy slurring as if he was barely awake. She peeked through the cracks of her fingers taking note he was indeed in his boxer-briefs. Joss put her hand down allowing him to slowly make his way to his bed.

"John don't go to sleep yet." she demanded when he pushed the covers back.

"No more showers."

"No I promise no more showers. But hopefully the one you took will break the fever, and here take some aspirin to help." Joss hurried back to the bathroom opening his medicine cabinet finding the ibuprofen quickly. Joss made her way back out getting him a glass of water before she walked back to him with the glass, and two pills. He took them without any fight, and he laid down without another word. He was sound asleep in minutes. Joss pushed the covers down exposing his wound for her. It was inflamed and she needed to cleanse it.

Joss walked back to his bathroom forcing open his medicine cabinet, and pulled out some gauze he kept on hand, some bandages, and some ointment. Joss carried her supplies with her to where John laid in bed sound asleep. He looked slightly better, but not much. She dumped the stuff she was going to use on him on the bed beside him so she could lean her forearm across his forehead. He still had a fever, but his forehead didn't seem so hot to the touch. Joss needed something to wear because goosebumps ran up her arms from it being cool in his loft, and since her clothes were still wet from the impromptu shower she joined she was stealing one of his shirts. Joss found his closet, and she rummaged through it looking for something to wear until she found one of his dark colored dress shirts. She pulled it on, and buttoned it up feeling engulfed in it as the sleeves hung over her hands, and the hemline reached her mid thighs. It felt soft on her skin, and she decided she was keeping it for herself no matter if her shirt dried soon or not. His shirt was now hers.

Joss eyed him as he slept without awakening, and she climbed onto the bed on the same side where his wound was. She flicked the lamp on to get a better look at it shaking her head. John had done a good job at closing it up. She could clearly see his skin burned meaning he had used something extremely hot to cauterize the skin shut. She brushed her fingers across his cheek knowing that had to have caused him a lot of pain, but it was most likely the only way to stop the bleeding.

The wound appeared to be healing, but it was too swollen in the area surrounding it meaning he had to have an infection. She needed to clear it out somehow. She sighed scooting off the bed going to his kitchen finding a dull knife. She ran his faucet to get super hot water, and began washing the knife as best as she could with hot soapy water. She needed to sterilize this somehow she quickly shut the water off making her way back to where he laid unmoving snoring softly. Joss needed to make a small incision just enough to allow some of the infected fluid to evacuate his body. She brushed a light finger across his cheek as she climbed back onto the bed.

"Forgive me John." she whispered bringing the tip of the knife to his skin before just so lightly pressing the tip into the wound. His cry of pain made her want to cry like a baby for hurting him, but she needed to help him.

"Shhhh its okay." she whispered to him as she prodded the area pushing earning a gasp out of him. She took some gauze and swiped at the area that produced blood, and fluid out of his wound. She continued to do this for a while trying to get as much of the infected fluid out of his body while John's body was stiff, and his eyes were open pain radiating out of them. "I'm going to put some Neosporin on this." he looked at her nodding his head without speaking. Joss picked it up, and felt bad when she spread a generous amount across his wound knowing it was stinging. He didn't even flinch from it. Joss grabbed some gauze taped it across his wound, and added a bandage on top of it.

"Go back to sleep John I'll wake you up in a few hours to eat, and drink something." she whispered and his eyes were half open but remained on her.

"You kissed me."

"Excuse me?" she laid down beside him on his bed. She needed to stay awake, but the days leading up to tonight had been hard on her. She hadn't slept more then a few hours in like three days.

"You kissed me in the warehouse. Why?"

"Go to sleep John we can talk about that when you are feeling better."

"Kiss me again." his voice was so quiet she almost missed his words. His eyes were barely open, but he was refusing to go back to sleep. John needed rest to get better, and she had to wake him up in a few hours to change the bandages, and to keep him hydrated.

"If I kiss you will you go to sleep." his head barely nodded up and down. She leaned over him brushing her lips against his ever so lightly. She pulled back wanting it to be a real kiss, but not with an ill man. She smiled when his eyes shut totally, and fell asleep once more unable to hold out any longer. She eyed him as his chest rose and fell as his breathing evened out falling into a deep sleep once more.

When he was feeling better they were going to have a very long talk about what had happened to him during those few days after the explosion, and then about what was going on between them. She was tired of pretending they weren't anything more then just friends. It had been easier for them both by ignoring whatever it was between them pretending they were just friends. Joss knew he felt it too, and they had both without acknowledging why they did it kept distance between them after those harrowing days of him being in Rikers, and his situation with the bomb vest. She had wanted space from him afraid of her emotions, but now she couldn't stay away even if it was for the best. Joss couldn't fight this anymore she was so tired of fighting it, and it was high time they confronted what they were feeling for one another regardless if John wanted to or not.

* * *

Author's note: Well this was supposed to be an one shot, but it grew too long, and too big of a story to keep as just a mere one shot so it expanded to a two shot. It almost could become a full length story but I forced myself to limit it since I have too many projects going on right now as it is lol.

The next chapter will be posted soon like Monday night Tuesday the latest depending on what I have to do tomorrow hahahahahaha. Now forgive me since I am clearly not a doctor, and I'm sure I took a lot of creative liberty with this, and so I apologize if its not true to form lol. I just love writing where John is hurt, and his lady love can save the day I don't know what its about having John all hurt, and vulnerable :) :)

Anyways I hope you enjoyed the first chapter, and I appreciate everyone who reads/reviews my stories it makes me write more(I swear I have a never ending list of ideas for these two its a borderline obsession lol)though not sure if that's a good thing or not but either way I appreciate all your support nonetheless :)


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's note: ::::::::::Warning:::::::::::::::::: rating change hahahahahahaha I'm sure most know why ;) Joss is in for quite the night *waggles brows***

**I hope you enjoy!**

* * *

The muted sounds of birds chirping somewhere greeted his ears as he slowly awakened. What the hell happened to him? He had to have been hit by a semi truck because his entire body felt achy, and weak. Yep being hit by a semi explained why he couldn't seem to force his eyes to open, or even move a muscle. But his mind refused to be happy with that explanation he needed to know what really happened to him. He tried to remember why he was in so much pain. Oh yeah not a semi truck more like a gunshot to his abdomen, and a bomb exploding sending him flying through the air with a harsh landing.

_Joss! _

She needed him she had been outside of the warehouse just before the bomb exploded most likely trying her best to get back in to come save him. What if she got hurt because of him he never live with himself?! He had to find his way back to make sure she was safe, and sound. John squirmed wondering where the hell he was, and why it felt like he was flat on his back on something soft and very warm? John tried to force his eyelids open succeeding for a whole millisecond before snapping them shut when the light hurt his eyes.

"John you with us?" that sounded suspiciously like Joss's voice, but that wasn't right she wouldn't have been able to find him thanks to one of Fredrick Bombay's kidnappers. Rodney Mulvey was the only other survivor as they both escaped out of the building set to explode. Mulvey had taken him with him trying to find out where they were taking Mr. Bombay, but they should've really listened to John when he politely asked them to let him go. "Concentrate on opening your eyes John." okay that really was her voice. He must of died because the last thing he could remember was shooting Mulvey, and trying to close his wound.

"Mr. Reese concentrate on our voices." Oh hell now he was hearing Harold's voice too. His eyes snapped open unwillingly in surprise when he felt a lick of a definite dog's tongue across his cheek, and very bad smelling dog breath filled his nostrils. He tried to clear the haziness as he tried to allow his eyes to adjust to the light. "Bear get off of Mr. Reese." John reached his hand up, and petted Bear smiling softly at the dog before the dog finally listened to Harold hopping off the bed.

"Well welcome back to the living John." he shifted his eyes off of Harold to Joss who stepped up towards the bed wearing tight blue jeans, and a lavender colored t-shirt. Her dark hair was down, and her face was free of makeup which made her look even more beautiful. John looked away trying to figure out what happened as he took in his loft. How did he get here, but a better question was why he couldn't remember arriving at his place? But a more pressing issue made itself known as he realized he had to pee, or he was going to embarrass himself in front of Joss, and Harold. He shoved at his covers swinging his legs out, and hating the feeling of weakness in him. "Whoa where you going?" she tsked as she stood directly in his way. He didn't bother to answer trying to stand up, but she quickly shoved on his shoulders keeping him on the bed with just a gentle amount of pressure. He scowled hating being so damned weak.

"I need to get up."

"Why?" she asked again when he went to stand up, but she easily kept him down again.

"I need to use the bathroom."

"Oh well why didn't you just say so?" he wanted to point out that he didn't need permission to go use the bathroom in his own place, but by her determined look he kept his mouth shut. John slowly got to his feet, and he staggered a bit unsteady feeling like his legs were going to give out on him. He felt her wrap her arm around his waist gently while Harold grabbed his upper arm, and even Bear was watching him as if he needed some help. He wasn't some weakling he could walk to his bathroom without them, but as the further he walked the more he felt tired, and the more he leaned on them. John couldn't remember the last time he felt so weak he had been shot many times before, and never had he felt this amount of weakness, and unsteadiness in him. When he finally got to his bathroom he grabbed the doorframe to steady himself as he entered the room. He went to go shut the door, but couldn't when Joss's body was in the way as she tried to make her way inside as well.

"Excuse me what are you doing?" John stared at her incredulous, but Joss had a small smile on her face peering up at him.

"Coming in to help."

"I don't think so." helping him walk over to the bathroom was one thing, but helping him in the bathroom was where he drew the line.

"Why not?"

"Because I don't need help."

"You didn't seem to mind me helping you undress the other day." he blinked his eyes confused. What was she talking about? She never helped him undress before.

"Come again detective?"

"Its nothing Harold John just wouldn't get in the shower so I had to undress him, and force him into one." her eyes were on his searching, and he shook his head. No, he wouldn't have done that she must be mistaken besides he never did anything he didn't want to do, and she was suggesting she had forced him into a shower. But the pressing need to pee made him not argue the point as he just shut the door in her face. He could hear her grumble to Harold that he was grumpy. He wasn't grumpy he just didn't like not knowing what happened, and he was at a clear disadvantage as Joss seemed to know more of what happened then he did right now. But he was going to rectify that after he relieved his bladder.

When John finished he slowly pulled the door to the bathroom open, and Joss nearly fell in since she must have been leaning against the door waiting. He caught her with his good arm still using the other to protect the side where he had been shot. She pushed off his chest, and where her hands touched him burned. She lifted her chin in defiance when he glowered down at her.

"I was just listening to make sure you didn't do something stupid again. You are a very bad patient John you know that!"

"What happened?"

"Shhhh we'll talk about that after you get back in bed, and eat something."

"No we talk about it now."

"After you get back in bed."

"Joss." he was in no mood for this. He wanted to know what was going on, and she had the answers.

"John." she put her hands on her hips, and they glared at one another neither one backing down.

"Mr. Reese if I may I agree with the detective you need to rest up, and surely you are still quite exhausted from your recent ordeal." he flickered his gaze from Joss to Harold feeling like they were ganging up on him. But all he saw was concern in their eyes for him which made him relent. John wasn't used to have people caring for him, and no matter how much he wanted to know what happened he would do as they said for now to make them happy. John slowly made his way out of his bathroom, but Joss blocked him from continuing.

"Put your arm on my shoulders John."

"No I'm too heavy I'll crush you."

"You men are such babies! Fine do it yourself see if I care." she snapped walking away from him angrily. His eyes slid down to her butt encased in tight jeans which he rarely ever got to see her in.

"Mr. Reese I'm not sure if it's a smart idea angering the woman that's been by your side taking care of you for the past 34 hours." John's eyes quickly snapped to Harold's, and away from Joss's nice body.

"What?"

"Mr. Reese do you recall coming in late Wednesday night?"

"No, what day is it?"

"Its Friday morning. Its actually 8:25 a.m. to be exact." Harold answered looking at his watch. John leaned heavily against the doorframe shocked that he had lost an entire day, and the events of that day were blank. He didn't remember much of anything since he had capped the guy that took him, and shutting his wound. "Mr. Reese are you alright?"

"Fine." hell no he wasn't fine he couldn't remember an entire day, and that had never happened to him in his life. It now made sense to him why he was so weak, and tired if he had been out for the past 34 hours he must be a bit dehydrated. John tried to make it the entire way over to his bed but the exertion was tiring, and soon he was leaning on Harold.

"John you are so stubborn!" Joss muttered hurrying over towards them to help him climb back into bed. Joss shot him looks that he was sure made criminals shake in their boots, but all it did was intensify his desire for her. Joss being pissed off at him was a total turn on which was why he shoved her hands away when they got too close to where he wanted her to touch him. He finished pulling the covers back onto him. "Stay put, or I will use my cuffs on you!" she admonished with a fierce look in her eyes before walking back towards his kitchen.

"Sexy talk doesn't work on me." John called out earning a soft chuckle from Joss. He turned to look back at Finch who was staring at him with raised eyebrows, and wide blue eyes. He shifted under the probing look not wishing for Harold to realize quite the extent of his desire for the detective. John liked to think he was a closed book especially with his feelings for Joss Carter.

"Mr. Reese I'm not at liberty to tell you what to do or what not too, but pursuing a relationship with the detective might not be in the best interests for either one of you." he said quietly just for their ears only. John watched Joss as she continued making breakfast on his stove.

"I have absolutely no idea what your talking about Finch." playing dumb was his best option when he was in a conversation he did not want to have in the slightest. Besides it didn't matter just because he had feelings for Joss didn't necessarily mean she shared them. Thankfully Finch seemed to understand, and dropped the line of conversation. Joss walked back over to him plopping a tray of food, some orange juice, and water in his lap. When did he get orange juice? The food looked great the eggs were scrambled, and he had like six pieces of bacon along with some sausage on the plate.

"Do you like ketchup on your eggs?" he shook his head not needing the condiment.

"You don't have to wait on me."

"Eat John." she grabbed a piece of bacon shoving it into his mouth when he opened it to say something else to her. He chewed on the bacon smiling as he looked back down grabbing the fork digging into the eggs.

"Okay now I'm back in bed, and eating can you please explain to me what happened?"

"You first John. We searched for you after the warehouse exploded, and we couldn't find you." he looked up when he thought he heard a quiver to her voice. He searched her big, honest dark brown eyes, but her expression was closed off.

"You wouldn't have one of Bombay's kidnappers escaped with me out of the warehouse, and took me with him in place of Mr. Bombay."

"So they could use you as leverage in finding Mr. Bombay I presume?" Harold stated it more then asked it, but John nodded his head as he continued to eat.

"Yeah I asked nicely for them to let me go, but they didn't want to listen so I forced my way out. I hid in a nearby cabin where I pulled the bullet out, and closed my wound."

"Why didn't you call us John?"

"I couldn't."

"Why?" John looked at Joss for a moment she looked upset about something, and he didn't know what to say.

"Well for one reason I lost my phone during the explosion sometime, and secondly I had to make sure that Mulvey's partners didn't come after Mr. Bombay again."

"So you let us think you were dead, so you could protect that old man's life!" he stared into her hurt eyes. When he didn't say anything she shook her head, and he could swear he saw tears forming in her eyes, but she blinked rapidly and they were gone. "Do you have any idea what it was like for me, or for Harold to go through that?!"

"Joss I didn't think of it that way."

"No clearly you didn't think at all." she stood up, and he reached out trying to grab her hand but he missed it. "Who cares about the people that care about you right? They don't deserve to know that you are alive, and in need of help! Who cares that they think that you are dead, and are drowning in misery?! Who cares about them as long as you save the day?" John struggled to get up thrusting the tray beside him on the bed not caring if he spilt the water or orange juice. He had to stop her from leaving. He watched as she angrily walked to grab her jacket and purse. Harold watched them both without saying anything, and he forced his weak limbs to work. He got to his feet, and hurried unsteadily towards her grabbing her jacket before she could put it on.

"Joss I'm sorry." he wasn't used to apologizing for his actions, but he seemed to have really hurt her.

"That's not good enough." she didn't look up tugging harder on her jacket.

"Joss you're right I didn't think of you, or Harold's feelings and for that I sincerely apologize for. I'm not used to having people care about my well being." she looked up into his eyes, and he hoped she could see he was being honest. He hadn't thought of them feeling like that his first thought was to protect the man's life, and not care about his own. John swayed a little on his feet, and she glowered as she threw her purse back down on his couch.

"John what do you want a setback or something?! Get back in bed." she pointed at him before gently shoving him towards his bed.

"You won't leave?"

"I won't leave but I'm still mad at you John, and you are going to have to grovel at my feet to get back in my good graces." he smiled at her when she tried keeping an angry tone with him, but wasn't succeeding. John stared down at Joss and he felt like he was getting lost in her eyes unsure of what was happening, but they both jumped when Harold's phone rang breaking the strange spell that had been overtaking him. He took a small step away from Joss, but she seemed to think it was because he was still unsteady on his feet. She helped him back to his bed while Harold spoke on the phone to Lionel. Harold hung up pulling on his own jacket.

"I gotta go I'm sure you are in good hands with detective Carter Mr. Reese."

"What's wrong?"

"Detective Fusco is in need of some aide." John went to go shove the covers he just got back on him off, but Joss shot him a look that gave him pause.

"Move one cheek off that bed, and I will shoot you in the kneecaps." she said with a cheeky smile, but he had no doubt in his mind that Joss would force him to stay put. "I'll go help Fusco I can shoot just as good as John can. Maybe better." he deserved the dig since he had hurt her without meaning too.

"Neither Mr. Reese's, or your specialty of shooting is needed actually its my service that the detective needs."

"What?"

"He needs me to hack into the FBI database."

"WHAT! Never mind don't tell me I don't want to know." she sighed.

"Its good to have you back Mr. Reese, and hopefully up and on your feet again in no time. Come along Bear Mr. Reese needs to have some rest."

"Call me Finch if you need any help." Joss called out as Harold hurriedly limped his way out of his loft. John watched as Harold shut the door behind him, and Bear leaving Joss alone with him. She walked away from the bed back into his kitchen opening his fridge, and he saw it full of food and beverages.

"Did you shop for me?"

"Well John you had absolutely nothing in your apartment so I went grocery shopping a little bit while you slept."

"You have a life you don't need to take care of me anymore."

"Don't tell me what to do." he sighed knowing she was still mad at him.

"What about Taylor?"

"What about him?"

"Surely he hasn't been here as well."

"No you're right. He stayed first with his friend for a night, and then with his grandmother since Thursday till this Sunday night. So you are stuck with little ole me all weekend."

"Joss why can't I remember anything?"

"You had an infection John." he looked at Joss as she sat down on the edge of his bed near his feet. "You were already running a fever by the time you arrived here, and not acting yourself. I finally got you to take a shower, and take some medicine which you promptly passed out afterwards from exhaustion only a few minutes later. I only awoke you minor times to change your bandages, and try to get some water in you."

"I've been asleep for the past day and a half?"

"Practically yes." he now knew why he felt so weak. He stared at her for a moment.

"Joss did you really believe I was dead?"

"I didn't know what to think John. You were M.I.A. for days."

"Did you believe I was dead?" he asked again, and this time she finally gave him the answer he was fearing.

"Yes I didn't want too, but when there was no word from you it was getting harder, and harder to keep my hopes up." she looked down, and he reached out touching her chin to raise her eyes up. "John I thought I lost you."

"I know it doesn't make up for it, but I am sorry for not getting in touch with you or Harold sooner. I didn't know how much time had passed, or anything everything was happening in a blur. I just knew I had to stop my bleeding, and make sure Mulvey stayed away from our person we were trying to save."

"You're such a good man."

"No I'm not."

"Better then me. I didn't want to save that old man instead of you."

"But you did."

"I didn't want to leave you in there. It was all my fault John." he watched Joss who was strong, and independent burst into tears. She buried her face into her hands, and her body shook slightly. He sat up, and leaned forward ignoring the slight pain in his side, and wrapped his arms around her as she cried. He didn't know why she felt like it was her fault, but he figured to let her cry it out first, and then get to the bottom of what was going on here. It took her a few minutes to stop crying but she did, and he pushed back watching her wipe at her eyes first then at her wet cheeks. "I'm sorry I don't normally cry like this."

"Its okay Joss. Nothing that happened that day was your fault."

"Yes it was." when he just looked at her she grew defensive. "It was!"

"I don't understand Joss what part do you think is your fault?"

"You getting shot was my fault." why in the world did she think that?

"No it wasn't."

"Yes it was." he watched as she stood up angry at him for disagreeing with her. "You wouldn't have been shot had I just listened."

"You don't know that."

"Yes I do."

"Joss you were worried about Fredrick, and you acted out of instinct."

"Which got you shot, and had I listened to you most likely you wouldn't have been. You could have died John because of me."

"No."

"John that bullet was meant for me!"

"And I would gladly take another if it means you're safe."

"You don't get it."

"Obviously I don't so why don't you clear it up for me Joss?!"

"I hate that you got under my skin John. I hate it because you were supposed to be nothing more then an ally in my fight for justice!" she sat down beside him on his bed again. "I can't lose you I tried to stay away from you because I was growing too attached to you John. It was easier to hide away from what I am feeling for you then dealing with it, but its not working anymore." their eyes bore into one another's as if trying to make sense of what they were admitting to one another.

"I know the feeling. I tried to keep my distance when I realized I told you things I never shared with anyone before."

"So it was true those things that you told me back when I was interrogating you?"

"Most of it was true the names were different, but the stories were real. You weren't supposed to mean anything to me other then an asset in the police department, but somewhere along the line it became more to it then that."

"I'm so tired of pretending that there isn't anything going on between us John."

"Me too." he leaned forward capturing her lips with his. She sat stunned for a moment before she was kissing him back. Her eager body was pressing more fully into his as he tasted her lips over and over again. He couldn't get enough of her mouth it was intoxicating as he cupped her jaws with his hands. John swept his tongue across her soft lips, and she let out a startled groan of delight opening her mouth in invitation. John accepted quickly slipping his tongue deep into her wet cavern enjoying exploring the inner recesses of her mouth. Joss's arms were around his neck as her body moved closer to his, and he found himself on his back with Joss half laying on top of him. Joss pulled out the kiss sucking in air as much as he needed too.

"What are we doing?" she gasped.

"Kissing." he supplied which earned him a dark look, and he nipped at her neck in response loving the little shudder she gave.

"I know that John. What I meant is you're still recovering, and I am still mad at you." he traced his fingers down the length of her spine then gently cupping her behind which earned him a soft moan.

"Mad, gotcha." he lifted up to kiss her again, but she shook her head pushing back away from him.

"I can't think straight with you kissing, and touching me." she batted at his hands that were at her ass.

"That's the general idea Joss." he smiled up at her. She scooted until she was fully off of him, and stood by his bed. He sat up watching her.

"John stop teasing me."

"What's wrong Joss?"

"I can't have you like this if its not real."

"What are you talking about?"

"You were flirting with me, and not acting like yourself because of the infection or fever or both. But I can't handle it if this is all its stemming from."

"You think I'm kissing you because of my infection?"

"I know it sounds dumb but John its-" he shot up quickly trying to ignore the weakness in him as he pressed his mouth against hers again deciding he had to prove to her he wanted this as much as she did. John pulled her back onto his bed laying her down beneath him as he continued to kiss her deeply. She gasped when he pressed against her intimately taking the advantage plundering her mouth with his tongue. He tore his mouth off of hers so he could stare into her eyes.

"I want you Joss."

* * *

"_I want you Joss_." the soft spoken words wrapped around her heart, and refused to let go. Joss stared into his eyes wishing, hoping, and praying he was telling her the truth. She had been fighting her feelings for him for so long, and she wasn't quite sure she could do it anymore. Joss kept her eyes on his soulful blue ones searching trying to see the truth in them. Her anger at him diminished, but she wasn't about to tell him that she had already forgiven him for the pain he caused her.

"Does that answer your question Joss?" he asked pressing sweet, and loving kisses across her cheeks before pressing himself more fully into her. She couldn't answer him verbally so she leaned upward to kiss him which he quickly took control of. Joss got lost in the sensations as John continued to kiss, and pin her to his bed. They broke apart when he proceeded to lean down to press gentle kisses to her neck.

"John what about your wound?" she gasped when he swirled his hot, and wet tongue against her skin making her almost forget about anything else but this.

"What about it?" he asked between kisses. He sat up allowing her to do the same, and he proceeded trying to yank her shirt up and over her head. But she refused to lift her arms until they addressed his wound. He shrugged his shoulders slipping his hands beneath her shirt cupping her breasts through her bra causing her to gasp. John softly pushed her onto her back, and pushed her shirt up just enough to expose her breasts to him. He leaned down sucking on a tip through her bra. She moaned at the feeling of having him so close, but yet not quite touching her the way she needed him too.

"I don't want to hurt you." she gasped out as her back arched off the bed when John seemed to have enough of teasing her. Because John pulled her bra down just far enough to expose one nipple to gently tease it with his tongue. She grasped a fistful of his soft graying brown hair as her body writhed under the loving attention of his mouth. John's mouth was talented as he continued to lavish her breast with attention. John's hand was behind her back unclasping her bra, and he sat up. She moaned a protest but when he went to lift her shirt off again she didn't stop him. He threw her shirt off, and pulled her bra away from her body too. He cupped her breasts with surprisingly gentle hands.

"Perfect Joss." he sighed before he began lovingly caressing the other breast with the same amount of attention as he had previously. Joss tried to breathe as John sucked gently at her nipple while he slid his one hand down between them slowly unbuttoning her jeans. She couldn't think straight with John on top of her doing these wonderful things. He was hurt, and shouldn't be doing this.

"John wait-" her words clogged in her throat when he slid a hand into her loosened pants beneath the frail fabric of panties.

"I'm sorry what were you going to say?" he sat back from her chest smiling up at her while he pressed his hand at her core her legs spreading. He rubbed her clitoris in soft, and gentle circles which was slowly short circuiting her brain. "Oh Joss you're so wet." he moaned harshly before kissing her again swallowing her gasp as he slid a finger into her. He removed his hand from between her legs, and he sat back. John stood up so he could push her pumps off of her feet before reaching for her loosened jeans. Joss felt him pull not just her pants, but her panties down leaving her completely naked for him. She couldn't believe this was really happening, but when he didn't climb back on the bed she opened her eyes. He was smiling at her as he slowly sunk to his knees at the side of the bed.

"John what are you doing?" she stared at him questioningly, but she yelped in surprise when he grabbed her legs pulling her to the edge of the bed so that her legs dangled over his shoulders. He gently held her hips with his hands eyeing her from his perch between her legs.

"You said I had to grovel at your feet so this is my version of groveling Joss." he answered before leaning forward to gently trail his tongue across her inner thigh.

"J-John this isn't exactly what I meant." she felt like her brain shut down with his breath hot on her, but he wasn't touching her yet.

"I am going to love you till you see stars." Joss's hips lifted when he touched her clit with the tip of his tongue. She squirmed to get away from the intense sensations, but she was pinned in his tight clasp as he began gently exploring her entire sex with his tongue. She gripped his comforter in her fists as his gentle exploration grew more aggressive as he learned her body. Joss couldn't drag in enough air as she moaned his name harshly as her thighs spread wide in abandon John's mouth was talented, and so damned wonderful against her. His hands cradled her hips while he continued to pleasure her.

"O-John I'm about to-" she tried to escape his mouth, but he wouldn't let her. John's mouth was everywhere, and she couldn't think straight. The tension in her was growing to an intense level, and she felt like every nerve ending in her body was about to explode. John sucked on her hard, and she felt like fireworks exploded inside her as a buzzing lit in her ears, and her body jerked high off the bed as she cried his name out. Joss didn't become aware of her surroundings until the last tremor of her orgasm faded, and John was sweetly kissing her thighs.

"You with me?" he asked quietly. His hands still on her hips as she continued to shake from the force of her orgasm. She blinked her eyes, and nodded her head a little. He smiled. "Good because you are about to come again."

"No John I can't not so soon." she moaned trying to close her legs, but John's head and shoulders were still in the way. She tried to squirm away from him, but John wouldn't let go. What happened to the weak man that could barely walk?

"Relax Joss I promise you'll enjoy this." her body jumped, and tingled as he settled back in. She tried to escape his mouth, but she couldn't with his tight grasp of her hips pinning her down as he licked up, and down her quivering sex.

"John please." she begged trying to twist away from the sweet torture of his mouth. Soon with his gentle ministrations her body was coming alive again, and her loins felt like they were on fire all over again. John slipped one hand from her hip down between her spread legs sinking into her wet heat.

"You taste so good Joss." he mumbled between teasing licks of her labia nearly sent her over the edge. John laid his other hand on her stomach when he stopped teasing her finally sucking on her clitoris again which made her toes curl into his warm back stealing her breath. John lightly began scraping her clit with his teeth then soothing the soft sting away with his tongue, and repeated sucking, nibbling, and licking over and over again as he added another finger inside her.

"Y-yes John." she sobbed as she felt her body careening towards the abyss again as his clever mouth never seemed to miss a beat. She twisted her body as her hips undulated off the bed as a cascade of pure liquid fire tore down her spine as she went off again. John was right she saw stars, and after he wrung every last whimper, and spasm out of her was when he finally got to his feet. Joss's body felt like wax as he moved her more fully on the bed. John's mouth was on hers, and she moaned at the taste of her still on his lips. She felt his rock hard erection pressing against her belly. She shoved him till he was on his back.

"My turn." she dared him to refuse her. He lifted his hips a little when she grabbed the elastic band of his boxer-briefs so she could lower them allowing his large cock to break free of its prison. He was harder then a steel rod, and he was all hers. She twirled his underwear in her fingers staring at him taking her fill. She didn't need to feel so awful for looking at him now. Joss's body still was trembling from not one, but two orgasms when she finally flung his underwear off the bed before wrapping her right hand around him. John's hot male groan made her already wet, and sated sex tingle with need again. She licked her lips smiling devilishly allowing him to know exactly what she was going to do to him.

"Joss I won't be able to hold out too long. I've wanted you for far too long to be able to handle that for a long while." happiness filled her at his words, but she didn't care at this point.

"You'll be coming soon I promise." she caressed his length with slow strokes, before dipping lower cupping his balls lovingly.

"Joss I want to be inside you." she shook her head leaning her head down so she run the tip of her tongue down his long length which earned her another hot male groan out of him. She traveled back up before taking him into her mouth descending back downwards. John's hips lifted, and she loved his cry of her name. His cock throbbed in her mouth, and she knew John hadn't been lying that he wouldn't be able to last very long. Poor man had survived pleasuring her twice, and his stamina must have taken a hit since she knew he hadn't slept with a woman in a while. But Joss wanted her fill of caressing, and exploring him as he had of her. She sat back with her mouth inches from the head of his penis, and he blinked his eyes back open.

"John I am going to make you come just like this." he shook his head at her, and she held him steady for her as she took him back into her mouth fitting her lips just past the head of his penis sucking hard while swiping her tongue across the slit while she gently cupped his balls loving the shout John gave out. Joss wanted him to come desperately like this in her mouth, but John seemed to have other ideas. John sat up pushing her away from him.

"I have to be inside you." his voice was thick with need when he rolled them over. John's heavy body was on hers in a flash. He was kissing her, and spreading her legs wide for him. She gasped loudly when she felt his tip at her entrance just before he pressed into her inch by glorious inch. She broke the kiss to sigh his name out. John filled her stretching her full as he buried himself inside her. They both moaned when he slid as deep as he could go, and she locked her arms around his neck. "You feel amazing." he whispered in her ear his breath sounded labored.

Finally John began moving inside her, and it was life altering. His thrusts were gentle, and slow at first, but Joss felt him letting go. Joss's body was wound tight feeling the beginnings of another climax climbing. John leaned his forehead against her shoulder as his hips crashed into hers quicker, and his strokes drove into her hard, and deep stealing her breath away as she tried to meet him for thrust for thrust. Joss's hands slid down to his slick hips careful to not hit his wound reaching around to his muscled ass as he continued to bury himself inside her stripping away her sanity. John lifted his head, and their eyes met his hands tangling in her hair.

"J-JOHN!" she cried out as she bit his shoulder hard as her body convulsed as another orgasm ripped into her. She flung her head back onto his pillow feeling like her entire body split into two as she writhed in overwhelming pleasure so intense she was afraid she was going to black out from the sheer force of it. John continued to fuck her relentlessly with long, powerful strokes of his thick penis inside her. Joss wrapped her arms around his neck, and her legs around his hips feeling his body stiffen above hers her sex still contracting from the orgasm.

"Joss good god you feel amazing." his words were a choked whisper in her ear as his body trembled. His hips became frenzied as he bucked against her she knew he couldn't ward off his orgasm any longer. Her name was a strangled shout of ecstasy from his lips as he thrust deep into her one last time holding her hips tightly to him as he came deep inside her. Joss held him as his entire body shuddered, and jerked until he came back down from his sexual high. John slumped on top of her gasping breaths before he rolled over to not crush her. They laid in silence for several minutes trying to calm their raging pulses before either one said anything. "Where do we go from here?" John whispered between ragged breaths.

"I'm not sure."

"Well we aren't just friends that's for sure."

"No I agree we are much more then just friends." she smiled rolling onto her side relishing in the fact that she got to touch him now anyway she wished. She ran her hand across his sweaty chest. He ran his fingers down her cheek as they continued to stare at one another.

"Am I forgiven for causing you so much pain?"

"Yes, but you can keep making it up to me." she grinned before placing a lazy kiss across his lips snuggling up to him making sure she didn't hit his wound.

"How so? I do love making you cry my name." she smiled. The man did have a wicked mouth, and the sex was phenomenal.

"By promising to never scare the hell out of me like that again."

"That's not as fun as fucking your brains out." she chuckled softly.

"No, but I need you to promise me this John. I care a lot about you, and you once told me I wasn't alone well neither are you."

"I know that now." he nudged her with his nose until she looked into his eyes. "I am really sorry for scaring you Joss, and I promise to try not to scare you again." she nodded her head taking his promise to heart, and his apology.

"Thanks, and I know you are sorry John."

"How about I make it up to you?"

"How?" she grinned as they continued to stroke each other's cooling bodies.

"Anything you want Joss." his smile grew wide, and his blue eyes danced.

"Hmmmm any…thing I want?"

"Any." his voice dropped an octave, and held full of promise.

"Can I cash this in anytime I want?"

"Anytime, and anywhere." he promised. She hugged him closer to her feeling his lips in her hair, and finally for the first time since John went missing she felt content.

* * *

Author's note: *sobs* see this is why I was so sad at cutting it short here lol. I had a whole another chapter to go along with this but I literally forced myself to finish there. So I did with regret. I hope you enjoyed, and I think I caught all my errors in this chapter I had more then a few and I was shocked since I usually write better, and only have a few minor grammatical, and spelling errors. But sheesh not this chapter so I sincerely hope I caught everything lol. Anyways thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoy.

As always I thank everyone of you guys that take the time to read/review my story :) :)


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